Wait. Before you write this off as a cheap ploy to grab your highly divided attention, consider this:

Great sex is special because it doesn’t happen all the time. It’s not the same old same old. It’s not the status quo. And like exceptional customer service, it makes us feel really good. That’s why we call it great.

Let me tell you about two recent service experiences.

Phone call + empathy + action = satisfaction

Six months ago we were having problems with our website server, so I called the senior Customer Care Ninja at our hosting company. Here’s how it went:

He listened carefully while I explained the problem. He paid attention and didn’t interrupt. Then he repeated the problem back to me in his own words so I knew he understood.

“Have I got that right?” he asked, and paused to let me answer.

When I told him how angry I was, he let me vent and listened — without being defensive or trying to placate me.

It took a day before things were completely resolved, but after that first call I knew this guy would make sure our problem was fixed. And that’s exactly what happened.

Yes with alacrity

It was a busy night and the restaurant was crowded. Our waitress was warm and genuinely herself. You got the sense she was glad we were there and that she wanted us to have a good time.

Even though the place was packed, she was always attentive. She noticed when we finished each course, and knew just when to ask about another round of drinks.

She was very tuned-in to the rhythms of the meal and the talk at the table. We were deep in conversation she didn’t interrupt. She sensed when we were ready to order; when we were ready for dessert.

Whatever we wanted, she was quite enthusiastic. She instantly said “yes” to everything, like it gave her another chance to make us happy.

The good feelings were immediately contagious. Her enthusiasm and attentiveness made us feel great. And that feeling bounced right back at her. Mirror neurons reflecting happy feelings. You could practically see the good vibes as she moved around the room.

So what lies at the heart of making any customer service experience positively remarkable?

Whatever the context or industry, these three principles are what allows the magic to happen:

Synergy – Each party gives something and gets something in exchange. And through that exchange the outcome is greater than the sum of its parts.

Emotional, not conceptual  – Great service experiences depends on both parties’ appreciation for one another. Satisfaction is based on how we feel, not what we get.

Genuine – However much training service providers get, delivering real satisfaction can only happen when people are genuinely themselves and sincerely care about making sure customers are satisfied with the exchange. Service and satisfaction happen on the spot in a continuous flow of experience.You can’t choreograph great service, but you can foster the appreciation and empathy that bring it about.

Got some other ideas about exceptional customer service? Tell us right below in the comments. We’d love to hear. (And if you like this post go ahead and share it with your people).